After eight years and 10,000 miles, I’ve finally completed my round Britain coast walk, finishing at Clacton-on-Sea. Stepping into the pub for a celebratory pint, I’m greeted at the bar by the local MP, a gurning Nigel Farage, shaking my hand for a photo opportunity.
To avoid this nightmare scenario, delicately ignoring the fact that my achievement would be of no interest to our possible too-awful-to-imagine future Trumpian PM, I’ve returned to Salcott to run the gauntlet of speeding traffic on five miles of busy roads, squeezing into narrow verges against high hedgerows, stopping frequently and sometimes running to clear a corner with limited visibility. I’d hoped an early Saturday morning might be quieter than a work day. It’s not. My original plan was to wait until this section of the English Coast Path is opened, but that seems as far away now as when I skipped it three years ago.
The green in front of the picturesque Peldon Rose pub offers a brief sanctuary.
One more section of verge hopping and I’m safely on the causeway across to Mersea Island, flanked by silent guardians.
My OS app tells me I can follow the sea wall to the ferry at Mersea Stone despite the negative signs, which I’ll ignore as I need some fun after the road walking, and I’m not picking samphire.
I hope all these makeshift bridges are still intact.
Thousands of crab shells are strewn across the marsh where they have shed their old exoskeletons.
I’m on the wrong path, forced to leap across a channel and climb up the sea wall, which I should have followed from the start. The wall continues without any breach.
It’s a scorching last day of May. A large plant blocks a gate, and as I push through, stripped to my t-shirt, I feel a sensation on my bare skin. Mistaking the alexanders plant for phototoxic giant hogweed, I rinse precious drinking water over my arm.
At the end of the seawall, I hope to catch the foot ferry across the River Colne, following people to the end of a sandy spit.
Everyone else has booked a seat, so I’m lucky to squeeze in. I’m the only one getting off at Point Clear beach, the ramp lowering onto a shingle slope with nothing visible beyond the top of the bank. Perhaps I’m marooned?
Cresting the bank top, beachfront homes stretch out before me, some well-kept and others falling apart, backed by a large static caravan park. There’s a belligerent sign at the end of the private road:
The owners have no intention of designating this as a right-of-way.
Good luck with the English Coast Path negotiations.
Leaving the holiday homes behind, another long sea wall winds across the salt marsh, far from the sea.
A strange private dwelling sits alone on the marsh.
Disaster strikes. It’s so hot, my bag of chocolate peanuts has melted into a sticky gloop.
Plank balancing skills are needed before Jaywick to enjoy the cooling breeze on the seashore.
Another static caravan park sprawls along the coastline. I won’t miss these views in the Highlands.
A perfect seaside day.
Clacton sighted.
The Wetherspoons opposite the pier is heaving, loud, and to be avoided. My CAMRA guide recommends the Old Lifeboat House, set back from seafront hullabaloo, perfect for a lazy pint in the shade to celebrate the completion of a continuous route through England and Wales.
Next up is another gap to be filled, this time in Scotland, a 100-mile section between Tarbert and Oban that requires some thought to avoid the long miles of road walking. I wanted to finish the East Coast of Scotland, but there are no trains north of Inverness for the entire month of June, so I must battle the midges on the West Coast.
Total distance: 5,104 miles.
Well done for finishing the English coast.
I wonder when the England Coast Path will finally be completed – they have done the easy bits, but the hard bits with recalcitrant landowners are still a challenge.
Thanks Ruth. I really wanted to wait until this section was opened but after three years there seemed to be little progress and I suspect I will finish the entire coastline first. 🤷🏻♂️
Congrats Tony! As Mersey Island was not on my agenda I went inland to Wivenhoe and back down again to Peldon – avoiding MOD areas which you would probably walk through! Jaywick remains the most deprived area I have experienced on my walk as yet. Deeply depressing. Well done again!
Thanks Tricia. As the sun was out, I spent most of my time looking at the sea, so Jaywick did not seem better or worse than any other large holiday park.
These were uncared for seafront houses – lots of pitbulls, Alsatians and obesity – loud domestics.
Oh yes. I did see a lot of run down seafront houses.
You are getting there.
Congratulations Tony. That bit from Salcott was scary when we did it very early on Saturday morning…..pity about bumping into Furage though….must have been one of the rare times that he’s visited his constituency.
That was just my nightmare Mike. What might have happened if I’d left this section until the end. The pubs are so rammed there I’d not even see him if he was at the bar! 😀
Tarbert to Oban has some nice sections, but lots of tricky peninsulas and some unavoidable A roads, especially towards Oban – you could be excused for heading inland to miss these! The Knapdale Peninsula and Ellary are really nice though. Enjoy the midges!
PS – June/July would be a great time to visit Orkney.
I’m currently in a hobbit hut at Port Ban where I can see the Paps of Jura from my bed with the door open. One day of road walking and today I headed inland through the hills. Chosen the worst day to wild camp tomorrow at Kilmory Bay with the forecast for a deluge all day. 🤷🏻♂️
Yeay congratulations 🎊 👏
Shame about the Farage incident, I hope you bleached your hand
Just a possible future scenario. 😀
Congratulations on finishing the English coast, I particularly like the silent guardian photo. Was there a particular day that really exceeded your expectations, in either a good or bad way?
That’s a tough one. Day 217 is certainly up there but I’m biased as the Northumberland coastline is where I grew up. Finishing at my favourite castle, Dunstanburgh, with a gorgeous sunset and then meeting my sister in a cosy pub with Lindisfarne playing on the juke box. Happiness.
You almost had me, certainly a nightmare scenario that one!.. although it would have provided the opportunity to ‘accidentally’ spill your whole pint over him. Normally I’d consider it sacrilege to spill a pint, but there are worthy exceptions.
Hopefully the big plant wasn’t giant hogweed, maybe just it’s close relative hemlock😉
A perilous path we walk. I know you have a fondness for flirting with quicksand.
Well done Tony!
I’m also walking the ECP but less interestingly sticking to the actual trail and waiting for bits to open before doing them. Their ‘progress’ internet page describes Salcott to Jaywick being approved in full but not yet open. I don’t know how they’ve solved the 5 mile main road and the unfriendly seafront residents.
Incidentally I was at the bar at the Brentwood Brewery taproom one Saturday morning a couple of months ago and all of a sudden a slight figure in a pink suit was standing next to me – in for a drink on the way up to his constituency from Kent. Your worst nightmare by the sounds of it. He was very charming though so you would have been fine.
Thanks Stephen. Good to hear from you. I catch up with Tom now and again for a beer. You should join us next time.
I don’t know how they will solve than road stretch as it’s all marshland on one side. I’m not holding my breath.